I’m busy, busy, busy trying to get the fifth chapter of In Pain and Blood ready for the 3rd of July. And there’s the re-read of Dark One’s Mistress to get through before I can even think about releasing it…
So, my fellow Weekend Writing Warriors and Snippet Sunday Folk, here’s a piece out of my oldest story. It’s been with me for around nineteen years now, and I’m still chugging through the critiques for the second book. I give you…
The Rogue King
Veng woke screaming, every muscle twitching in an endless spasm. It arched his back, twisted his limbs. Sweat slicked his skin. He opened his eyes. Light burned its way into his mind. A fresh shriek escaped his parched throat.
Klara. That single thought broke through the pain. Klara could fix this.
Outside is dangerous.
Such is the warning Koral has heard for twelve years. Born a product of genetic manipulation, he knows little else of the world beyond the steel walls of his home.
When fate gives him the choice between certain death and the unknown, there’s no question in what he must choose. But he’s about to find out the sands he must brave are full of more than mere monsters.
Providing the desert doesn’t kill him first.
This is a world ruled by instinct, where innocence is drowned in blood. Here, men are offered up to the great Serpent God, Lorric, only to emerge as the most feared killers on the planet: The Rogues.
With the god’s sights set on turning Koral into a legend, he must sacrifice himself to survive and be reborn as… The Rogue King.
This is a very visceral snippet that drew me right in to his pain.
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Thanks.
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Wow! This piece cuts to the bone, Aldrea! Very powerful imagery, in so few words.
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^_^
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Well that was intense! I hope he’s right and Klara can help him (but something tells me it can’t be that easy, right?)
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Not easy? No. Especially with Klara having flown the coop.
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Wow! What a situation. Gripping.
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Thanks.
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Wow, I could feel his pain and terror. Well done!
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Write what you know, yeah?
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Visceral is right! I really feel for him. And I feel the same way every time I don’t have wine for a day or so. 😉
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I don’t know about that, but I did feel something similar when the doctors gave me pancreatitis.
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At least he has a chance for relief.
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Ah, yes, relief will certainly be on the way. Just not from who he expects.
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Here’s a case where jumping right into something big works! Definitely has me interested in finding out why, when, who, and where 🙂
Marcia
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Glad you think that as it’s the beginning of a chapter.
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That’s pretty much what I would expect withdrawals to feel like.
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Alien drugs, man. And to think they use the same shit as a painkiller… Good only in small doses.
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Yikes. This definitely drew me in. Great writing!
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Thank you.
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This is very powerful writing. Great snippet!
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Thanks
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short, but intense. well done!
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Yeah, short sentences really add up. Thanks.
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Oooh, I wonder what’s going on! Great snippet and great use of short sentences.
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Withdrawal from ahok. It’s a terribly plain-looking desert flower. But consume it and it’ll dull any pain as well as give you a sense of invincibility, not that you’ll remember much of your time whilst on it. It’s addictive and, if you take too much for too long, your heart will give out.
You can get it in liquid form, too. Then it’s called ahoka.
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Intense snippet. At least he is aware enough to know that there is someone who can help.
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This time, yeah.
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Holy crap that was intense.
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Reeled me right in. I really want to know who Klara is. Excellent writing!
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